American Underwear and Birthday Shots

Posted on June 18, 2011


Dear Bus 116,

Last night I took this bus and forgot to get out at my stop. I started talking with this old, old, old lady and lost track of not only time but where I was. I knew that the bus would drop me right behind where I needed to be but I just didn’t know how long it would take! Normally I will just walk from an earlier stop but I had no clue just how far down the Rome Rabbit Hole I was going. I left my house at a quarter to 9pm and finally hit my stop at 10:18!!! The movie started at 10:15 and I was way late…it was my plan to even catch the last showing so my being tardy was rude and a mistake! I now know the entire route of this electric bus which is a good and a bad thing. I continued to talk (mostly listen) to this lady tell me about her entire life and ask me a few questions here and there. I squirmed in my seat when I realized that we took a quick turn and were on his street. Where he works. I felt like an unintentional stalker performing a silent drive-by. Like a car crash my eyes glued to his work while we passed and I was even holding my breath. I did not see him outside his work which was probably for the better. I was on my way to see a movie with someone new, I might even call it a “date” since he bought my ticket, and I get stuck on a bus and forced to drive by his work!? I have never seen this bus near his work ever but its a fact that it drives by his place of work. Damn it.

It was Miss Texa’s birthday last night so instead of watching the strange film with us she told me to meet her and some friends after near Trastevere. There are no words for this film it is seriously the strangest movie yet I went to see it for a second time! It was in fact a little better than the first time but still left me perplexed and wondering what it all means. Together, Brien and I, walked towards Trastevere after the movie and exchanged conversation about how we felt about the film. He was at a loss for words too but that is what the movie does to you. We soon found Texa and her friends and went for some birthday drinks.

We passed the place with the chocolate shots so we popped in there for a hazelnut whipped cream surprise! Texa was not into hers since it went up her nose and interrupted her breathing! She doesn’t drink much and already had a few drinks so she was feeling good. Feeling her birthday if you will. Soon we found some more of Brien’s friends and they began telling us about these crazy drinks that they insisted that we try. Tonight. Right now! “The will take you to the next level!” One of them tells us. I am a little nervous when they began describing a drink called the “threesome.” An oversized tumbler glass hold three shot glasses at the rim. One shot is vodka, the other peach schnapps and the last grenadine. The large glass has a double shot of Midori and lemon soda. As you take each shot the glasses rotate and eventually the last shot of grenadine drops in and then you slam the remainder of the drink!

Dangerous indeed. We did it and took pictures of our before and after faces.

The next shot was at another bar across the way and this one was called the “Harry Potter” because it involves fire and magic dust that sparkles. Everclear is lit on fire then while only a percentage of the alcohol is burned off cinnamon is sprinkled on the flames which creates a colorful array of sparkles and shine! Pretty. Then pretty disgusting. My eyes burned. My throat burned. I couldn’t breathe and my mouth  couldn’t swallow. That is right I pretty much drooled in shock and amazement once it went all the way down my throat! By then we were all glassy-eyed and stumbling as the bars closed on us at 2am. There was nowhere else to go so we stood around trying to seem sober together and convince each other that we were “fine” but we are bad liars. Texa had a very happy birthday indeed! I got home around 3:30 and crawled into bed. It is only Thursday night…

Morning came too fast. I was nervous to move in fear that I might be really hung over. Or worse: still drunk? In our drunken goodbye last night Texa and I changed our plans for the weekend and decided to go to Florence on Saturday instead or seeing 30 Seconds to Mars. I can see them anywhere. Florence is something much more important! And for similar prices I think that traveling is more exciting. I have seen Jared Leto before and actually hugged him and took pictures with him many years back! Florence it is. Decision made.

When I finally decided to make myself get out of bed around noon I felt alright. I had a note on my bathroom door to get Matteo early if possible and I knew that I had to. It has been a trying week for him and it is my job after all. I threw on some shorts and realized that I was out of short socks. I finally did my laundry today but I will get into that later…I put on jean shorts and a pink tank top with grey socks with pink bows at the ankles with some Nikes. I would never wear something like this but lately I really don’t care what I am wearing while out. I ran out the door without water and was dying in the heat. It is so hot but sweating out all the liquor from the night before made sense. My dehydration kicked in and I had to wait in line at a tiny drinking fountain in the school yard with three tiny kids in front of me. They were probably three years old. The fountain alone is about two foot tall minimum. After I waited for each kid to dribble and take their water a tiny boy behind me asked if I was someone’s mother! I told him no and that I didn’t have any kids. He then asked me my name so I told him. What a cutie! I am getting better at responding in Italian and the small conversations with children are always the easiest. (Not like the hour-long bus ride with the blue-haired blue-scarfed and blue-eyed lady talking it up the night before!) I found Matteo outside playing and took his sweater from his locker. I wanted to walk but he insisted on taking the bus. Fine. By the time that we made it home we were both thirsty. He changed his shoes and pants solo and drank some water. I brought my computer out to the living room to keep an eye on him. He changed his clothes again and put on his other shoes and told me that we needed to go outside to play. I told him that was not possible and tried my best to explain that since I took him early from school that he needed to take it easy. He got pretty mad at me for telling him that we were not leaving but after a few minutes he calmed down. First he slammed his hands on the piano while I pretended to ignore him and let him get it all out. He then changed his clothes (again!) and told me, “Ciao Lexie..” and started towards the door. I locked the upper bolt and told him that I was sorry. “Pick a movie and relax!” I told him and ruffled his hair. He let out a long sign and sulked over to the movie selection. He landed on a Gormiti film so I set it up and asked if he wanted some juice or water. “Juice please,” he tells me. I just love it when I don’t have to ask him to say stuff in English! I made him a “snack plate” and he was happy sitting on the couch with cheese, juice and prosciutto. He needed help opening his crackers so I went over to the couch to help him out. After his show was over he wanted to play with his Gormiti so he asked me to get them down from the top of my closet for him. I agreed but told him that he needed to put his other toys away in his room first. He agreed and I helped him clear the floor in his room. He was happy playing alone on the carpet behind me. T came home a while later and couldn’t get in! I forgot that I deadbolted the door! We only lock it at night so she was confused. I told her that Matteo was threatening to leave without me so that is why I locked it. She understood and I told her a little more about his various wardrobe changes, what he ate and watched.

Soon T asked for my help to load some pictures onto her flash drive. I have never done this before but I figured it out for now. She also wanted to make sure that the internet chip worked so that we have a wireless connection for when we go to Tarquinia. There will be a slow connection but there are a few places in the house that the internet works and she told me that when I am there alone I will want a connection! The look displayed a worrisome expression since I am sure that she knows I am on the computer daily. I can live without a computer but I can’t live with nothing to read! I better stock up on my books before the kids are out of school.

I was bringing my load of laundry inside and nana jumped right in to help me. I got a serious lecture about washing my darks and lights together, which I know is not good but I pretty much do one load every two weeks so everything just goes together. At least I don’t wash towels together! I got the finger in the face and then she proceeded to help me hang all of my laundry! I usually separate my underwear and hang them to dry in my room but she made me hang them outside in the sun. She wasn’t exactly “judging” my colorful thongs but she sure had a new expression examining my “things” (roba)…she even asked me if all of “my things” were made in America!!! Yes. All of my colorful underwear are made in America. Victoria’s Secret mostly…almost embarrassed. I just love her for always putting me on the spot…even while helping me with my wet clothes she is always there for me.


Posted in: When in Rome